ML:BW

29
May

Highlights from the Memorial Day Stay-cation of 2012 included:

  • Spending time with my brother
  • Hanging out in the sun, on my back deck, with my dog
  • Lot’s of grilling and eating a delicious fruit and cheese plate
  • Spending what time I could with my busy husband
  • Having lunch on the deck with Teeny and Jake
  • Mani/Pedi
  • Checking out all of the beautiful flowers in my yard
  • Watching dragonflies and butterflies buzz about
  • Reading all of my favorite Women’s Magazines
  • Listening to Eat, Pray, Love
  • Dinner with my family on Sunday and the first bocce game of the season

I have another stay-cation planned for this weekend. But tonight I get to go on a really fun date with Jay. Heading to my favorite place in Boston. Plus 1 if you know where that is…

18
May
I’ve had this stupid fucking writers block for so long. That choking fear that if you say too much, if you’re perfectly and completely honest, you will face too much ridicule or risk hurting others entwined in the story you’re trying to unfold. Something hit me tonight while I was reading this really honest, no holds barred novel by a woman I recently met. She uses language that I would be anxious about putting in my own work. Like, what if my FATHER read that? What would he think of me using such filthy language. Truth? I think he’d be proud that I stopped giving a shit about what others think of me. But, back to this riveting novel and inspirational writer — what she has done is blow me away. She has opened my eyes and broken down the blockade, eliminating so much of the fear that has stopped me. She gave me my starting point. Not only that, but I am finally starting to regain my balance, getting my head above the water and really breathing. Moving beyond some stressful situations at work and seeing Jay relax, even just a little, about the construction of Getaway, has allowed me to ease up myself. Tonight we went on a date. On this gorgeous New England evening, we went to a surprisingly cute area in Lowell and ate delicious barbecue. We held hands as we walked down the street. I barely remember what we talked about. It was just wonderful to get out, together, and enjoy that hour or so. It was the first real date we had been on since he came home from tour, and it was so desperately needed, for both of us. My advice, unsolicited, is that you need to find time to be with one another no matter what the hell is going on. Unless, of course, your partner is actually on the road. It’s important for the relationship and for the sanity of you both. Tonight my newly minted designer/Twitter friend Craig (@CraigNB) tweeted: “Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must live.” Dear God did I need that tweet. I’ve felt like an insane person, living in someone else’s skin for the last two weeks. I finally feel like I am coming back to earth.

I’ve had this stupid fucking writers block for so long. That choking fear that if you say too much, if you’re perfectly and completely honest, you will face too much ridicule or risk hurting others entwined in the story you’re trying to unfold.

Something hit me tonight while I was reading this really honest, no holds barred novel by a woman I recently met. She uses language that I would be anxious about putting in my own work.

Like, what if my FATHER read that? What would he think of me using such filthy language. Truth? I think he’d be proud that I stopped giving a shit about what others think of me.

But, back to this riveting novel and inspirational writer — what she has done is blow me away. She has opened my eyes and broken down the blockade, eliminating so much of the fear that has stopped me.

She gave me my starting point.

Not only that, but I am finally starting to regain my balance, getting my head above the water and really breathing.

Moving beyond some stressful situations at work and seeing Jay relax, even just a little, about the construction of Getaway, has allowed me to ease up myself.

Tonight we went on a date. On this gorgeous New England evening, we went to a surprisingly cute area in Lowell and ate delicious barbecue. We held hands as we walked down the street. I barely remember what we talked about.

It was just wonderful to get out, together, and enjoy that hour or so. It was the first real date we had been on since he came home from tour, and it was so desperately needed, for both of us.

My advice, unsolicited, is that you need to find time to be with one another no matter what the hell is going on. Unless, of course, your partner is actually on the road. It’s important for the relationship and for the sanity of you both.

Tonight my newly minted designer/Twitter friend Craig (@CraigNB) tweeted:

“Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must live.”

Dear God did I need that tweet. I’ve felt like an insane person, living in someone else’s skin for the last two weeks. I finally feel like I am coming back to earth.

17
May
Sometimes life catches up with you and you feel like you’re underwater. You wake up a half hour before your alarm, every day, and are out the door two hours later to spend nearly an hour and a half in traffic. Then you work for eight demanding hours. And sit in just as much traffic as you did that morning, listening to a book, to get home. Much of the time you try to cook dinner, clean up a little around the house and spend time with your husband. But the studio is being built in your basement and that takes priority, understandably. Even after your husband was away on tour for three weeks, there hasn’t been much time for the two of you because of aforementioned studio and all of the incredible people lending a helping hand. So, at the end of each day, you’re too tired to blog. You write ideas down on Springpad, but you’re too tired to follow through, or too busy, or both. And it results in a post like this, with an apology, and a question about whether or not anyone misses the regular updates? Who knows. Things will calm down and I will write more. This will have to do for now. How are all of you?

Sometimes life catches up with you and you feel like you’re underwater.

You wake up a half hour before your alarm, every day, and are out the door two hours later to spend nearly an hour and a half in traffic.

Then you work for eight demanding hours. And sit in just as much traffic as you did that morning, listening to a book, to get home.

Much of the time you try to cook dinner, clean up a little around the house and spend time with your husband.

But the studio is being built in your basement and that takes priority, understandably.

Even after your husband was away on tour for three weeks, there hasn’t been much time for the two of you because of aforementioned studio and all of the incredible people lending a helping hand.

So, at the end of each day, you’re too tired to blog. You write ideas down on Springpad, but you’re too tired to follow through, or too busy, or both.

And it results in a post like this, with an apology, and a question about whether or not anyone misses the regular updates?

Who knows. Things will calm down and I will write more. This will have to do for now.

How are all of you?