My Life as a Band Wife

getawayrecording:

Alas, I am, yet again, days away from not seeing my husband for approximately one month. It’s hitting me in a different and difficult way today, compared to other tours.

The blues don’t usually set in until after Jay has left, when I come home from work to find the little dog sitting alone on the couch with weepy eyes and all Jay’s tour bags gone from the house.

This time around, the blues thought they would visit me early, leaving me on the verge of tears all day. I admit, I feel silly, but I also understand where it is coming from.

From the minute he returned from the Touche tour, Jay has been busy day and night with the studio and work. I’ve barely had the chance to see him, it seems. I may have mentioned before, the week leading up to tour is always busy with extra projects and tying up loose ends. That husband of mine is a hard worker and a hell of a provider.

Plus, the night before they leave, there is band practice and we don’t exactly get that last night to ourselves.

Wah wah wah, I know, shut up. I will now. But I know I am not the only band wife - or girlfriend - who goes through this, so I thought it was worth a share. The takeaway here is that I am proud of and love my husband and I am going to miss him to death.

What do you do to chase away the pre-tour blues?

I am loving all of the places that the wedding is showing up, thanks to our good friend and photographer Zac Wolf! It includes some insight into the music Jay and I chose for our wedding. Admittedly, we weren’t in love with our DJ but the songs he did play from our list were fantastic.

Today I went off to the hospital (again) to get electroshocked and stuck with needles (again). I don’t believe I mentioned it, but recently I was informed that I have arthritis in my lower spine and that I may be dropping things and losing feeling in my hands because of carpel tunnel. Turns out, it isn’t carpel tunnel but more arthritis. Physical therapy, yoga therapy and occupational therapy for the foreseeable future. What fun!

That being said, my husband was kind enough to take time out of his work day to take me to the appointment. Last time they did the work on my left leg and I was unable to walk properly for a couple of days. I was worried about what it would do to my hands - turns out we only tested one and I probably could have driven. But. Jay and I got the new bacon sundae from Burger King. It was fine. It would be better made at home with crispier bacon and chocolate ice cream.

I tried to sit outside in the sun after my appointment with the latest issue of Cooking Light, but my projects were calling to me so I went inside and got to work.

Now, after making turkey patty juicy lucy burgers with apple and Gruyere, kale chips and grilled peaches with brown sugar and balsamic, I am listening to Feist radio on Pandora. I love how much Regina Spektor the station plays. Plus, drinking a glass of white and doing some writing. 

How was your day?

This evening Jay and I worked on dinner together. Well, sort of. We made pulled pork sandwiches and guacamole. I love women’s magazines and I found this recipe in Woman’s Day.

One of the great things about Jay working from home is that he can run upstairs and throw some stuff in the slow cooker for me. Last night I prepped the barbecue sauce and he cut up the meat and put it in the cooker today. When I got home the house smelled amazing.

And, dear God, it was delicious.

Here is the recipe. It does have a cabbage slaw, but I opted to skip that this time around.

Enjoy!

This is my six-and-a-half pound chihuahua, Niles. He is not six pounds. He is not seven pounds. He is six-and-a-half pounds. Sometimes he looks like a pig. Sometimes he looks like a rat. Or a bat. Either way, he is the sweetest little man there is.

This little dog hates having his photo taken. Hates it. Just like his mom and dad (yes, we are pet parents). It took me two plus days to get these shots of him. One of the things the house came with is a cat door down to the basement, where the previous owners kept the litter box.

This is perfect for our situation. Niles can choose to hang out upstairs with me or head down to the studio with Jay. After living in so many places with us, he is finally in a place where he can wander as he’d like. I really think he is happier than he has ever been.

Last night after dinner, Jay and I went on a romantic trip to Home Depot to look at potential stains for all of the trim in the studio. The floors were installed today and tomorrow he starts putting it all together.

Which is perfect, because we are currently sharing an office. Which is down the hall from our bedroom. As I am sure you can imagine, doing mix work and tracking while I am trying to sleep has made things rather difficult. Plus, I’d like to be able to move all of my books into…well, a book shelf later to be obtained.

Of course while Jay was looking at stains, I looked at cleaning products and paint swatches. One day, I will paint the walls of my office. I am always drawn to purples and blues. We’ll see what strikes me when the time comes.

And of course there are these: gorgeous sparkly paints by my girl Martha Stewart. Why not consider some hand stenciled designs? I do like to keep things a little bit light and whimsical.

You know those days when you’ve been writing blog posts, devising social strategies and trying to understand how to articulate data for an infographic and your eyes start to cross? When you are no longer able to shake your head and clear up your vision?

Maybe some of the elements that cause your eyes to cross are different, but the result is the same: you need to take a walk.

I’m lucky enough to work in a building that runs along the Charles River. There are a lot of things I like about this space, but I have to admit, this is my favorite feature. I’m a nature girl at heart, which is why I live in the “rural suburbs,” and having this element where I work is a boon to my morale.

I do, indeed, love that dirty water.  

One time I wrote a post about what my life/schedule is like. Remember that? This is my morning, editorialized in photos. Unless you knew me in high school and college, you probably don’t know that I have a true affinity for the beauty industry. I worked in salons and spent a few months at Sephora (before going back to the salon). I love doing makeup and I love learning about hair products, styles and techniques. This is the highlight of my busy morning, which is coupled with a cup of green or dandelion root tea.

My least favorite part of my day is the commute — although I have to admit it wasn’t that bad today. I pass the time with talk radio and audio books.

Over the weekend I did very little, as I wasn’t feeling well. I did do, however, set up my little desk in my office. The desk belonged to my Grammy. The top has a few items of inspiration; candles from pre-wedding celebrations, a painting of Paris from my grandmother on my stepmother’s side of the family, my tarot cards (yes, I do readings) and the beautiful orchid my mother-in-law gave us as a housewarming gift when we moved in.

Now I just need to clear out all of the clutter, move Jay’s desk to the guest room, install some bookshelves and decorate. It will all unfold as we are able to let it and I look forward to spending many hours writing at that desk, in that room.

As you know, we had a lot of changes with our house - from changing location to changing closing dates - and the plan for the studio changed several times as well.

So when the first band, Like Beasts, came up to record and crash for a week, not only did we have to find a place for Jay to record them. And come up with a spot in our house for them to stay without it interrupting our life.

We decided to put them into my yet-to-be-setup yoga and exercise studio. It is very rare that a band comes into our home and is both clean and quiet. Every morning they get up and tidy up the little room. Not only that, but they are ready to work at the designated time.

Over the last couple of years I have seen many bands come and go. This one leaves me impressed.